Live Fully Flourishing...
Because life is way too short to waste time on petty things
Do these sound like ways you describe your relationship?
- Just going through the motions....
- Getting by...
- Basically roommates...
- Keeping it together for the kids...
- Having the same argument over and over and over again...
You still love them, but you are not sure if you really like them anymore. You imagined things would be different when you first met ... and then life happened. You always meant to get back to being the couple you were before, but things seem to have changed too much.
- Perhaps they aren't the same person...
- Perhaps you aren't the same person...
- Perhaps you feel like you've hurt each other too much to come back...
Are you ready to give it a try?
Couples Therapy with a strengths-based therapist can help.
This is not an approach where either person is made to feel like they are the problem in the relationship or at fault for the relationship crumbling. Someone in the relationship might have made some really crappy decisions (infidelity, hiding money, telling lies, etc.), but that does not mean they did so without a reason.
Finding the reason behind these bad decisions is not a justification for the behavior, but it does give a context. And within that context, we are able to find a path forward... a way to make meaningful changes within the relationship... to have genuine forgiveness of each other with a clear plan for healing, safeguarding the relationship from future mistakes.
We don't spend time enumerating all the terrible things you've done to each other, all the things you dislike about the other.
Instead, we take a genuine accounting together of the pain caused by both of you within the relationship, examine how each of you are responsbile for these pains, and then spend the sessions making plans for the hopes you each have for the future of the relationship.
Couples therapy is best done when you can come together with good will and understand the intent of the other.
This allows you to disagree lovingly with each other.
Reach out for more information about this Strengths-Based Approach to couples therapy*.
It's goal-oriented, pragmatic, and life-changing.
*A note - sometimes people ask me if they would be able to do Couples Therapy without their partner joining in the sessions. There are many reasons for this -- they think that their partner does not want to come, they do not want their partner to come, or perhaps they just need a space to process things before they want to start the couples sessions. Long story short, yes, it can be done. Please click here for more information on how you can make that decision of what would work best for your relationship.
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